I have thought about the words I want to give you, from my heart, for the past 3 years. As you have grown and as I have gotten to see who you are becoming, I think I finally know what I want to say. My sweet daughter, I love you unconditionally. My heart holds so much love for you that it is too powerful to contain within me. You are a blessing and a miracle to my life - that I now know why our Father in Heaven kept me alive. To bring you to Earth. To grow, to have a body, to share your talents and spiritual gifts, and to become a child of God.
Mary, I will always be honest with you. I will also always know what's best for you, because I am your mother. You grew within me, your spirit and my spirit became one. I will always know best. It's part of being an in-tune mother. If you choose to be a mother, you will also always know best, just be patient for that day. No need to rush it.
I pray for you everyday. I pray that you will take chances, but hesitate only when you feel that still small voice, telling you something isn't right. I pray you will be kind to everyone you meet - even if they are not kind to you. Do not judge them, for they are already judging themselves. I pray you will always be kind to all creatures and plants, God created them all for particular reasons and I hope you respect that. I pray you will learn to watch where you are walking, running, dancing, and twirling - for I am tired of telling you. I pray you will continue to be concerned for others, express how you feel, be faithful, be honest, be creative, stay determined, be giving, fearless, and intelligent.
You will never hear me say that there is no money for college, Christmas, birthday, wedding, mission, etc. These are important traditions in your life, that your Father and I will fulfill when the time comes. I don't ever want you to worry about our finances. That is not your job. We have already sacrificed for you to attend preschool, because your education is that important to us. And when the time comes to choosing an extracurricular activity, fret not, you will be able to participate, for that is how we discover and develop our talents. You must never think that because Mom and Dad may not have money that you can't go to college. False. I will make sure that you WILL go to college. Any college you get accepted to. Where there is a will, there is a way. I WILL find that WAY. Do not ever give up on your hopes and dreams and talents just because we are not wealthy. I promise you, my love, we will always provide for you with what you need. You will be fed, clothed, sheltered, and educated. You will not have to sacrifice. That is our job.
You are the reason I started sewing and designing again. You were and are my inspiration for the fashions I create for you, myself, and others. If I have to design and sew and alter for others the rest of my life so that you are able to do the things that will better your future, I will. Because I am your mother. Because I chose to be your mother. And being a mother to you is more important than anything else in this temporal world.
Choose your friends based on how kind their hearts are. Never take without giving. Your friendships should be based on giving, whether it's support, help, sharing, caring, or just being that shoulder. I promise you, if you have kind friends they will do the same for you as you do for them. That is very important.
Before you choose who you marry, I encourage you to date. Date often and give everyone a second chance. If I hadn't taken a second chance on your Father, where would you then exist? I am so in love with your Father, and I want you to feel the same love or more for your husband as I feel for your Dad. But, do date those that uphold high standards for themselves. Rule of thumb: respect is gained through your words and actions - and based on the words and actions you choose, can attract respectable young men of caliber or smug young men who care only for their swagger. Caliber always defeats swagger.
Your Father and I have struggled through life often; alone and together. When struggles and challenges come into your life, remember that there is always a solution. For the struggle your are suffering through is only a mountain climb, and when you are done climbing that mountain there will be another mountain to climb. Life will always be faced with a challenge. Without these challenges you cannot progress in life and learn from mistakes that have been made. You must know failure in order to truly feel success. You must have faith that you can climb each mountain of struggle given to you. This is a lesson taught in the Scriptures and every Disney movie. Study both.
Serve others, and often. Whatever you choose to do with your life, use those talents and skills not only for vocation, but for service as well. Charity and service is how our Savior showed his love for his fellow brothers and sisters. I encourage you to do the same. Service is the only way to show love. The Lord wants us to serve his children. If we all gave service to one another, we would all feel more love. Everyone in this world is a child of God, and each child of God deserves to feel loved.
I hope you can look back on this letter and know how much I really love you. This letter was written with lots of heartfelt tears. There is passion in each word I write to you, because I am passionate about you and your life. I will always protect you from what I can control. I am doing my best to not traumatize you or make you afraid of the world. I will not give up on you, no matter your choices, I will always be there to love you, support you, help you, share and care, give you strength, and be that shoulder you need, and I will always know best.
Love always, Mommy